Tuesday, April 15, 2008

Today’s post is brought to you by the number 2, as in 2nd degree, and the letter S for Sunburn.

A week and a half after my 2 hours uncovered in the loving springtime sun in Austin, the pink, then dark pink, then RED of my upper arms and shoulders has faded, the pain has mostly subsided, and I am left with puckered, peeling, leprous arms – this has easily been the worst sunburn of my entire life.

Luckily, a slight cold front came through this past weekend, so I am able to continue wearing long sleeves to cover my unsightly, flaky limbs without looking out of place. It is really disgusting. I had intended to take pictures of my ugly red shoulders as a warning to you all, but the weak flash from my camera would have been too much for my skin to bear, and now they are all gross – I could still post a picture, but I’d like to keep my readership from retching all over their keyboards, rendering them unable to navigate to my humble blog.

Anyway, here’s my point: If you never, ever heed any other crappy advice I shill, hear me now: OH MY GOD PLEASE WEAR SUNSCREEN.

I have no segue for this next bit, so HERE:

J decided to try to grow some facial hair again, for fun, and out of boredom, and I hated it. After about 3 days worth of growth, I did a close inspection of the progress, and noticed a white hair or two in with the bright red. I pointed this out, and J denied, denied, denied. After 2 more days of growth, it became a little more obvious that I was right – I am married to a white-whiskered oldman.
I was getting ready this morning when J rolled out of bed, shuffled over, and pointed his chin at me – clean-shaven.

And so, I have agreed to have sex with him again. (I will admit that the weeklong sabbatical had more to do with my sunburn than with the unsatisfactory development of his scratchy scruff, but that was a good excuse to avoid whiskerburn).

So very busy this week – three meetings just today. I will make it a personal goal to have some kind of post at least twice a week – I hope I can stick to it.


Allie Bear said...

I am a huge advocate of sunscreen, seeing as how my husband had melanoma and all. I also don't want to look like leather when I'm 40.
As for the wiskers, that is one thing I love about my husband being in the army, a clean shave everyday.

I am Trish Marie said...

We are HUGE fans of the spray on sunscreen. Love it. I spray it everyone who comes within spraying distance of me every three minutes. Nobody has gotten a sunburn since I bought it. Although, I do go through, like, a can a week. Which probably means I burned a whole new hole in the ozone all by myself.