My mom and I had a fight over the weekend, and she’s being all sensitive about Mother’s Day, and throwing a pity party for herself that I’m the “oooonly chiiiiild” that she has to see (since my sister’s in Miss.), and that she is “competing” with my MIL for time with us.

Anyway, she’s asked that J and I attend church with her and my dad that morning. I hate my parent’s church – some of it has to do with the fact that I am just So Not Into Church Of Any Kind lately, but mostly because her preacher is of the Yell And Pound The Lectern school of theology, and because it is really embarrassing how she parades me in front of people. I am The Good Daughter, and I’m supposed to smile blandly and make polite small talk and wave like Miss America.

So, without causing a second blowup in less than a weeks’ time (which I just cannot handle right now), what’s the best way for me to politely decline the church invitation? I want to offer making lunch at my house, and we can have game/family togetherness time, but we’re already hosting John’s entire family for dinner that night. But I think the expense would be worth it: I can just get it all over with, and drink discreetly if I need to.

Suggestions?