I made my usual Starbucks stop this morning – I usually go through the drive-thru, but the line was incredibly long, so I parked and ran inside.
There, in line, was an alternate-universe version of my high school sweetheart. My stomach did a little flip-flop, until I realized it wasn’t him.
Sean was my first love, and our relationship, breakup, and continued friendship tinged with the gray of “Should we get back together or not?” totally colors my memories of my senior year in high school (a year that, because of that, I would not re-live for all the money in the world). It took me a year, a few rebound relationships, and a LOT of bad dates to get over him, but I admit that he still and always will hold a tiny piece of my heart. Isn’t it always like that with First Loves?
I haven’t seen him in about 6 years – it was a New Year’s party right after J and I got engaged.
I hear through the grapevine, and my covert Google ops, that he is married and living somewhere in one of those “I-“ states, I think (or is it Michigan? I don’t know, somewhere cold.) Despite my predisposition of distaste for my exes, I really, truly hope he is happy.
So I’ve been thinking about him this morning. It was all I could do to keep from going up to that random guy in line and giving him a huge hug. But I don’t really want to see him again. I just want to kind of put it out there in the universe:
I hope you’re okay.