Amazing Feats of Sarcasm and Nonsense
Raw, Unfiltered Gin:
Lukewarm, sub-par cheesecake is about as effective at quelling my terrible mood as a kick in the face. No. Thanks. Fuck. Off.
Oh man, there is nothing worse than a disappointing slice of dessert,is there? If I could, I'd send you your dream sweet to make up for the suck-ass cheesecake.
I have been craving cheesecake. Last year, we had this chocolate burbon pumpkin cheesecake at this little resturant in the small town my parents live. The guy only makes it mid-October through the end of December. I have been counting down the days since Jan 1st. I should bring you a slice! I promise to deliver it the correct temperature!
DUDE. *mouth waters*
"Chocolate Bourbon Pumpkin Cheesecake"?That sounds delicious and I fucking HATE cheesecake.
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